John*, my first client for the day joins our online Zoom session in a state of restless anxiety about the interactions with his teenage son Calvin. Calvin is having a difficult time coming to terms with the end of a relationship and manages his own anxiety through a number of behavioural addictions and recreational use
When we encounter a stressful situation which takes time to resolve, we tend to reach back to coping strategies learned in childhood. This reminds me of the title of Jenny TeGrotenhuis’ recent article on the John Gottman blog – “Under stress we all regress.” There is nothing wrong with coping strategies per se. The problem
Sometimes separation presents us with a binary choice: to open up to exploring what is not working in a current relationship or to walk away from it. Neither is an easy option. Each one offers unique challenges. Exploration only works if both partners are prepared to be honest and truthful – a risk difficult to
